This weeks blog article is about Social Self-Care. I see social self care as a core component of holistic self-care. Social Self-Care is the intentional effort to nurture and maintain meaningful connections with others.
Social Self-care involves creating a supportive network of friends, family, and community, and prioritising activities that foster positive social interactions and emotional well-being.
For some of us, this may seem easy. Hanging out with friends, being in a group of colleagues, spending time with our family and loved ones. However, for others, it can be a bit of a balancing act. Let’s take a look at some examples of what social self-care looks like and discuss why they are important.
Cultivating genuine friendships
Prioritise spending quality time with friends who uplift and support you. Engage in activities that strengthen the bond you have with these people, such as meaningful conversations, heartfelt gestures of appreciation or shared hobbies.
Over the years, I have been friends with a lot of different people at different phases and stages of life. Most of these friendships did not last, not in a terrible way, but mostly from the fact that they were situation dependant friendships. However, I can say they felt genuine (to me) and that made the difference.
The friends I had back in my University or party days – they were fun, I loved those friendships and have nothing against these people or the times we spent going out, etc. However, as I get older, I don’t have as much social energy as I used to and I want the energy to go towards those who truly mean the world to me.
So, instead of ‘catching up’ with every person I ever went to school with, worked with or met on a Contiki tour in my early 20’s, I put the energy into the close and meaningful friendships that I have. The ones where I can be myself, where I feel safe and can trust the person I am talking to.
For me, this looks like seeing a friend over a coffee, popping over to a friends house to sit and chat or a long lunch, or dinner with close friends that I don’t see very often. We talk about ourselves, our families, goals and love life. We do not indulge in pointless drama, spreading rumours or small talk.
As I got older, I realised that going to the pub and having beers with a bunch of colleagues was not fulfilling for my social self-care needs. If anything, it had the opposite effect, it made me feel more displaced and like I had to be a ‘chameleon’ to fit in.
But…that is just me, you may be the complete opposite and thrive off being in large groups of people. So, ask yourself what defines ‘quality time’ for you? What works for you and makes you feel grounded, connected and joyful, rather than overwhelmed and uncomfortable.
When you can be your true self with friends, in an environment that isn’t stressful for you, socialising can be really fulfilling.
If you are in a romantic relationship, make it a priority.
Cultivating a strong and fulfilling connection with your significant other can serve as a form of social self-care, fostering emotional stability, enhancing communication skills, and promoting overall well-being.
A few ways of creating a strong relationship with your partner are listed below. I have also written an article about relationships here, if you want to have a read.
prioritising effective communication
Clear and open communication is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Regularly engaging in meaningful conversations, sharing your thoughts, feelings, and experiences, and actively listening to your partner can foster a deep sense of understanding and empathy.
Mutual respect and support
Creating a supportive and respectful environment within the relationship is also vital. By acknowledging each other’s feelings, opinions, and boundaries, and offering support during challenging times, you can build trust and strengthen your emotional connection.
qaulity time
Carving out quality time to spend with your partner can be difficult, but I honestly think it is essential. Engaging in shared activities, such as going for walks, cooking together, travel, etc can help to deepen the bond you share with your partner and create lasting memories.
empathy & compassion
Showing compassion and kindness to our partners can create a safe space for emotional expression and build a stronger sense of emotional security within the relationship.
As women in the human services professions, we can get into a rhythm of giving all our energy to our clients and colleagues, only to come home and have nothing left for ourselves or our partners. I know I was guilty of this in the past, and looking back on it now – I can see why previous relationships did not last.
I never realised how much energy actually goes into having a healthy and strong relationship. But wow, the rewards are invaluable.
Maintaining relationships with family members
Strengthening the bond you have with family members can contribute significantly to your emotional well-being, create a sense of belonging, and foster a supportive environment for personal growth.
A few ways you can maintain relationships with family members are listed below. This may not be an easy task, especially if you don’t live near your family, are estranged from them or just have a strained relationship. But, if you have even one family member that you can strengthen your relationship with – it may be worth prioritising.
open communication
Encouraging open dialogue, active listening, and the expression of thoughts and emotions in a non-judgmental environment can foster understanding and empathy within the family unit. I have found that when I disagree with some of my family members, rather than getting into a full blown debate about it, just listening to their point of view and quietly agreeing to disagree is more effective.
expressing gratitude
Expressing gratitude and appreciation for the presence and contributions of family members can significantly strengthen familial bonds. Even just small gestures like saying ‘thank you’ to your mum for all the times she looked after you when you were sick, or acknowledging your childs efforts in cleaning up their toys. Whatever it is, even if it feels hard to do sometimes, just a little gratitude can go a long way.
QAULITY TIME
Planning family outings, or having regular family gatherings can foster a sense of togetherness and create lasting memories. Quality time spent together not only strengthens familial bonds but also provides an opportunity for meaningful interactions, fostering emotional intimacy and creating a sense of belonging and security within the family.
Along with saving energy for your partner and friends, we also need to set aside energy for our family members….gees – with all this energy, who has any left for work?!
Joining a community group
Engaging in community groups can be great for social self-care. It can provide you with a sense of belonging, purpose, and connection – that is outside of your close friends, partner and family.
Active involvement in community groups not only fosters a supportive network but also contributes to personal growth, emotional well-being, and a deeper understanding of social dynamics.
If you are not part of a community group and don’t know where to start, I would encourage you to firstly think about your values and interests. Then seek our community groups that are in alignment with these. Finding a community group that resonates with your interests, values, and goals is essential for building a meaningful connection within the community.
A few ways of engaging in community groups are by joining a volunteer group, recreational club, or a social activism organisation or a church. You could also look into yoga/other spiritual organisations, a book club, sports club and much more. Aligning your participation with your personal passions can foster a sense of purpose and fulfillment, leading to a more satisfying and rewarding social experience.
Being part of a community group you are in alignment with can help foster a sense of accomplishment and contribution. It also provides a sense of purpose outside of your job!
Another benefit of being in a community group is the ability to be amongst diversity. As we sometimes gravitate towards homogenous individuals that are ‘like us’. Spending time with others that have different cultural backgrounds, upbringings, careers, etc fosters a sense of acceptance, understanding, and unity among members.
Networking with others in the ‘helping’ professions
One aspect of social self-care that I never appreciated until starting a business in private practice, was the impact of networking with other professionals.
Networking with other human services professionals can significantly benefit our social self-care. It can provide opportunities for professional development, support, and collaboration within the field.
Engaging with fellow professionals fosters a sense of community, encourages knowledge sharing, and promotes a supportive environment for addressing professional challenges. Through networking, we can learn from one another’s experiences, gain valuable perspectives, and stay informed about the latest trends and developments in the field.
I have found that networking with other professionals has provided me with more emotional support and a feeling of solidarity. Given our work can be emotionally taxing and challenging, having a network of others who understand the complexities and demands of the profession can provide a valuable support system.
Furthermore, networking creates opportunities for collaboration and advocacy. Collaborating with other social workers on projects, initiatives, or advocacy campaigns can amplify the efforts to address social issues. It also enhances professional development and career opportunities.
Just by putting myself out there, contacting different agencies and talking with other Social Workers, I have managed to open doors to new career opportunities….that I absolutely love! Expanding professional connections within the field has made me feel more driven and more connected to my professional Social Work identity than I ever did working in government organisations.
In summary, some of the benefits of social self-care are:
- Reduced feelings of loneliness and isolation
- Enhanced emotional support and understanding
- Improved self-esteem and confidence through positive social interactions
- Strengthened sense of belonging and community
- Increased resilience when facing challenges in life
- Improved communication skills and empathy
I am sure there are many more benefits that are not mentioned here. By prioritising these aspects of social self-care, you can create a strong support system that contributes to your overall fulfillment in life.
